ifollowmyblood: ([Hero] I Want To Save The World)
“Life is just a chance to grow a soul.”

Getting his soul back was supposed to change everything. In truth, it changed very little save for the guilt and self-loathing. The conscience, the pain, that was all the bloody thing really was good for in the end. All it did was drive him mad and send him straight into that blasted pit where all he could do was feel...

Having a soul was fair worthless until he was back at Buffy’s side again. And even then, it wasn’t worth much.

Even when he recorporealized, failed at getting back to her and ended up with Baileigh instead, Spike wasn’t sure he’d made the right call and invested enough in his choice that he couldn’t very well have the bugger removed. Getting to know Bee, becoming part of her life all the way through to Searchlight...that had changed a lot.

That had given his soul value... )

[jp] soft

Aug. 24th, 2009 03:28 pm
ifollowmyblood: ([Emote] BIG Smile)
NOTE: Baileigh is [livejournal.com profile] deep_red_bells and Amelia is [livejournal.com profile] ratherbe_mspeel. Both are used with love and knowledge of their mun. Annie is [livejournal.com profile] morsus_mihi and mine to abuse as I see fit.


“Hmm?” Baileigh and Amelia murmured distractedly, heads lifting from the books they were studying.

“You’re both well aware there’s a surplus of chairs in this house, yeah? Some of them even outside in the sun?”

“Yes, love, we are.” Amelia assured him, leaning forward a little to show Bailegh her book. “I’m sorry, but is this what it looks like?”

Baileigh peered at the etching she was displaying, then nodded sympathetically. “Yep. That’s exactly what it is. Sorry.”

“Oh…well, that’s bloody disgusting.”

“So’s black pudding.”

“Hank likes it!”

With a sigh, Spike placed a hand on one leg of each woman that was seated on his lap. “If there’s so many bloody chairs in this house, why the hell d’you both have to sit on me?

..... )

Muse: Spike
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Words: 693
ifollowmyblood: ([Emote] Not Prepared To Run Away)
Oi, s' me. Didn't say thank you properly...for the hand, I mean. Lot of you bled to save me, but I appreciate you most of all. Meant a lot to me.

Anyway, er...I dunno. Gimme a call sometime, yeah? I feel pretty...peculiar about the whole soddin' mess. Guess I could stand to talk.

...right, then. Talk t'you soon.
ifollowmyblood: ([Emote] Still Abed)
"Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase."


Fever had him in its grips, blinding him with white-hot flame. Somewhere in the place where he could still think clearly, he knew he was dying and mourned the loss. Pain he could handle, delirium and hallucinations were no big deal. Hell, he could even stand in judgment and tough out having his victims paraded before him by the Almighty himself…he’d already put himself through that wringer once upon a time.

I don’t know if you can hear me…but you’ve got to trust me.

He could trust the pain, he could trust the dark. Blinding whiteness he couldn’t handle, he couldn’t go into it willingly. He wasn’t made for it, not anymore. He played at the edges, but all it was ever going to be was an act. Even his soul was a lie, torment for a demon’s life that the man had to atone for. Sins he’d committed, sins he’d never even conceived…

..... )

Muse: Spike
Fandom: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Words: 1,065
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